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You are here » Discussyes » Pages Timeline » It's time to LAUGH


It's time to LAUGH

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1

http://forumfiles.ru/files/001a/13/1d/47873.png
Share funny jokes, comedies etc Let laugh!

Last edited by San2os (27th Aug 2019 09:51 am)

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2

Last night a Chinese guy came to my favourite bar.

I asked him if he know kung fu or some other marital art

He said, "why do you ask me that? Is just because I'm chinese?!"

I replied, "No it's because you are drinking my beer!"

+1

3

Akpos was taking a walk in the wild places. Suddenly, a bush moved, and he saw a lion running toward him. Being a christian, he decided to pray and ask God to save him.

After a short but passionate prayer, he opened his eyes only to notice a lion kneeling down and praying with its closed. Puzzled Akpos asked the lion:

- So, are you also a Christian, right?

The lion opened its eyes and shushed at Akpos

- Don't you know one has to say a prayer before having lunch?!!

:crazyfun: :lol:

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4

Just Like Facebook
A friend of mine told me his experience -

He said, "I'm trying to make friends outside of Facebook while applying the same principles.

Therefore, everyday, I walk down the street, and tell passers by what I have eaten, how I feel at the moment, what I have done night before, what I will do later and with whom.

I give them pictures of my family, my dog and my garden, standing in the front of landmarks, driving around town, having lunch and doing what any body and everybody do every day.

I also listen to their conversations, give them the 'thumbs up' and tell them I like them.

And it works just like Facebook! I already have four people following me: two policemen, a private investigator and a psychiatrist"

:rofl:

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5

Kunle stole a goat, he as arrrested and taken to court

Judge: Gentleman, are you guilty or not

Kunle: My Lord, I'm not guilty

Judge: How come you were arrested and brought before the court for stealing a goat

Kunle: My Lord, I was just passing by Mr. Darlington's house and I saw a very big rope tied to a tree. I said to myself, "maybe the tree is trying to commit suicide," so I rescued the tree and took the rope home. My Lord... I swear I didn't realise there was a goat tied to the rope until now

The Judge freed Kunle

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6

FUNNY SAYINGS
1) If money doesn't grow on trees then why do bank have branches?

2) How do you handcuff a one-armed man?

3) Why do we wash bath towel? Aren't we clean when we use them?

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7

A smart ritualist was asked to present his wife as an item for a ritual. He went and cloned another mans wife face to resemble his wife through extensive make up!

After sending the woman to be used for ritual he returned home and found his wife missing. After searching for a whille he found his wife in the home of the man she had used his wife for ritual.

The man told him that it's a 50/50 business. You have the money i have your wife.

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8

My old aunts would come and tease me at weddings, "Well Sarah, do you think you'll be next?

We've settled this quickly once,I have started doing the same to them at funerals


Job Interviewer: "And where would you see yourself in five years time Mr Jeffries?"

Mr Jeffries: "Personally I believe my biggest weakness is in listening"

:rofl:

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